Me.

Hi everybody

Today I'm going to be talking about myself. I know it seems self centered, stupid, or just weird, but to me, I think writing about ourselves is one of the most important thing a person can do. I truly believe that it can boost your self esteem and self confidence! You learn about yourself and sometimes discover something that you never really paid attention to you that could be life changing! So sit back, relax, probably get bored and fall asleep...while I talk about myself.



I am 16 years old. I have brown hair and an unusual green color in my eyes. I am involved in numerous activities including work, horseback riding, playing the piano, softball, and drumline. I am a girl who stresses over her grades, the lack of sleep I get at night, and how people walk too slow in the stupid hallways.. like any other teenager would.

My clothes are ordinary, which is something new for me. I was never the kid to fit in anywhere, really, but that was then, and this is now. None of the past matters now.

I love horses, and I've loved horses ever since I would start walking. I have been riding for 7 years now, and hope to continue for the rest of my life. The horse I ride is named Rebel. He is about 18 years old and better than ever. Here's a picture of him!

I also ride with my best friend, Hannah Arnold. She had been my best friend since 4th grade, so that make it 7 years now! She's been through all the strange phases of mt life with me, but again, that's in the past, and this is the present. 

Hannah is just about the only person I can share absolutely everything with. I'm not a very open person, but more of a sensitive, -keep-to-myself kind of person. I can sit in a crowded classroom with no friends and just be quite and keep to myself. I can sit in a car with literally anybody and not say a word for the entire ride. I'm quite, and I like it that way, and Hannah gets it. 

We both love animals with our whole hearts and more, and want nothing more than to save their lives. Hannah and I vacation together to the lake of the Ozarks, we go to the mall and spend just about all of our money every time, and we also just hang around in her basement. I can easily imagine us sitting on our separate couches, pizza in one hand and an Xbox controller in the other. My laptop would sit right next to me, and her would be at her side. We would be laughing, just about at anything either of us said and just be having the time of our life. We have a very simple relationship, and to me, that's the best kind of relationship to have with a friend. She's my sister and I love her. 

I have been having a harder time this year in high school, but knowing that I have my best friend to talk to or text makes it bearable. No, we do not have a single class together this year-- actually we haven't had a single class together since 5th grade. Lunch has never been the same either. 

Speaking of high school, I hate it. At a minimum, I get 4 hours of sleep a night. I am always tired and overloaded with work that I barely get finished. I am in one AP course class, and two other college credit classes. I have hours of homework every single night, and usually don't finish or even attempt to try. I am pulling my hair out about getting a better score on the ACT, and don't even get my started on how worried I am about getting into vet school at Mizzou. I am always hungry, and this school is freezing. I never used to hate high school until this year. This is my first year without my senior friends from last year. This is my first year feeling completely alone. This my first year I struggled finding a lunch table to sit at. This is my first year without my boyfriend here with me.

This is a homecoming pic from last year, and being silly at the camera!

Yes, I do have someone other than Hannah that is extremely special to me and his name is Nicholas Bockhorst. He has striking blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. He is six feet tall and would catch just about anybody's eyes. He is very good with his school and is studying to get a biological engineering degree to become an anesthesiologist's assistant, which is something I am very excited about for him! We have been together ever since my freshman year and his junior year, which makes that 2 years and 3 months (and to be honest, I am very proud of us, because if you saw my school, there aren't many couples that even last a few months). And you haven't even heard the best part. We both hate ketchup! I finally met somebody else who absolutely hates ketchup! That's amazing!  We even made an agreement that if we are together and get a house in however many years in the future that would be, ketchup would be banned! No excuses! There is so much to say about his boy, but I'll just continue to keep it short and simple. I love him, too. 

Honestly, I don't know if you've ever written about yourself like this before, but coming up with new topics and transitions are hard and I don't like it... so, this is my transition phrase! 

                                                      

I have 3 pets in my house who mean the whole word to me. I have a 9, almost 10 year old, purebred Yorkshire Terrier named Tina, T-T, Tina-Bird, Teeny, Baby, Tina-Bird, BB, Turd, basically anything starting with a T, excluding a few others, she'll perk her little ears up and look right at you. Sometimes she comes, sometimes she'll give you a little smirk and lay back down, or sometimes she'll look at you and run in the complete opposite direction, but I love her just the same. She is literally the smartest dog I have ever met before in my life. She knows over 200 different words and around 10 different tricks. She can understand phrases such as: "Wanna treat?! Wanna go bye-bye? Do you need to go potty? Where's Mama? [Insert name here]'s home! Go get [insert name here]! She knows it all. 

I also have a little rose petal beta fish named Aragorn (obviously named after the king of gondor in the amazing Lord of the Rings....). He is a beautiful metallic blue with lush blue fins. Every time I walk up to his tank that sits on my desk, he swims right up to me, looking happier than ever, and waits for his food ever-so-patiently. He is definitely the coolest fish I have ever had. 

Lastly, I have a little 7 month old hedgehog named Arwen (and no, not after the janitor in The Suite Life of Zack and Cody....but after Aragorn's beautiful elf princess from the amazing Lord of the Ring's trilogy).  And let me tell you. She has the biggest little personality I have ever seen! (Excluding Tina, of course.) She is a little cream colored hedgie who loves to eat meal worms and sleep all day... (literally! She is nocturnal!)

[enter awkward transition skip here]

Okay, so today I experienced a life changing thing. You ever hear the saying "all grey clouds have a silver lining?" Well, this year has led me to believe other wise, more of a silver lining that holds a grey cloud. A very big, choking, and foggy grey cloud. 

Today I found out that my best friend Hannah is moving to Florida. My best friend. Who I was literally talking about, me being happy as ever, just a few paragraphs above. So innocent and joyful. Ironic, isn't it? You know something is coming your way when things seem too good, and it's true. There will always be something to knock you down, and I have to admit, whoever it is that is trying to tear me apart is winning. 

Hannah was the best friend any person would ever want to have. We would talk about anything, and we would never fight. If we haven't been together in months, and randomly decided to hang out, we would instantly pick up where we left off. Whether it be some stupid game we used to play in elementary school, or stupid inside jokes, we were always the same best friends from 4th grade. 

And now I feel completely lost. 

She was my only real friend. My boyfriend is in college and I see him about once every month, or every other month... but Hannah and I were together more than that-- and how she will be living halfway across the country from me. 

The point of this autobiography I am writing is to show the person that I've "so proudly" grown to be. And until this day-- I believed I was doing pretty okay. I had my whole life planned out, and of course Hannah living close by sure was planned in my future. I would easily fly through high school (which hasn't gone accordingly) and I would have the time of my life in college, sharing a major with my best friend (which is out of question now.) 

I am a believer of long distance relationships or friendships. But when you're stuck with both, it sure is hard to cope with just about anything. Now I have nobody here for me. I feel like that weird kid in the halls again, like in middle school. I feel like an outcast, imagining graduation without my best friend. 

And what I have learned from this autobiography, let alone this day itself, is that never take a friendship for granted, because you never truly know what you had until it's gone, and I will never have another school lunch with my best friend ever again.

much love, joy, happiness, and everything else i am feeling now,

liv...